I'm sad but he's glad...

I had a good laugh when I saw these writings on my Facebook wall. No prizes for guessing which one is written by my boss. I'm sure he didn't see my status when he wrote the birthday wishes.

On turning 30...

At 30, I am a very blessed wife and mommy. Thinking back, I remember that I've always wanted to get married and start a family of my own some time in my life. I didn't plan for it to happen by 30... there was no timeline for this plan of mine, but I suppose there isn't a better time for it.

I've done all the studying I need to do, gotten a pretty good job, spent a year in US (which in itself was a wonderful experience), bought my first property, married the man I love, given birth to my precious son. I've been showered with numerous blessings the past 30 years and I can't be more thankful. Moving ahead, I'll continue striving to be the Proverbs 31 woman. To be the perfect wife and mother.

Next week, I'll be going back to work after a 6 month break. I've spent almost every hour with Nathan ever since he was born. Such joy to be able to witness his growth, his development, his first smile, his first laugh, his first attempt at flipping over, sitting up, sucking his thumb. I enjoy reading to him, playing with him, bringing him out shopping. I know I'll miss his so much while I'm at work. It'll not be easy juggling full time work and motherhood. Dean and I have discussed this at great lengths, and we've decided that I'll go back to work when Nathan turns 6 months old. I'll try out this arrangement and we'll see how it works out. Am praying that I'll be able to find a good work-life balance.

Two are better than one... two plus baby makes three! I'm 30 this year. Next year, Nathan will sing me a birthday song and draw me a birthday card. Till then, I know I'll enjoy every moment of this new decade of my life.

5 months old

Dear Nathan,

You just turned 5 months old... you've been smiling a lot lately, and you respond enthusiastically (most times) when we interact with you. So much fun! Seeing you smile really warms my heart. I was reading somewhere that babies smile the most when they are 4 months old. Yikes! I hope you continue smiling as much as ever... :)

In preparation for "school", we've gotten you a little school bag. This is one of mommy's favourite photos of you... You love it when daddy lifts you up like that. Never fails to bring a smile to your face.

Daddy took time off work between the Christmas and New Year break and we got to spend quite a bit of time as a family. Mommy loves such times!

You've taken a keener interest in your toys. You are able to reach out and grab toys held in front of you. Once you grab them, you'd try putting them in your mouth. Everything that you get your hands on goes into your mouth. Pretty amusing to watch, but it means we've to be more careful about objects that we leave within your reach. You've also discovered your feet. You've been holding on to your toes, and grabbing at your socks. You try to put your feet in your mouth too, but haven't quite succeeded. You enjoy sucking your thumb - helps you to sleep and soothes you when you are cranky. With your thumb, you do not use your pacifier anymore. You're also learning to sit up on your own. Still not very stable as yet, but you are getting there.

We attended several celebrations this month. Por Por and Yi Yi's birthday, Naomi's, Hannes', Darius' and Shannon's first month parties, Uncle Jackson and Aunty Sharon's wedding at Sentosa, and Christopher's 1st birthday. You enjoy going out and try hard to stay awake even when the outings eat into your nap times. It's really funny when you try to fight the Z monster.

Mommy will be going back to work next month. The thought of going back brings tears... Having spent almost all of my time with you ever since you were born, I will surely miss you when I'm at work. Been trying to think up fun things to do with you in the last few weeks that I'm home with you. Still praying that mommy will be able to get a more ideal work arrangement so that I'll be able to work and still spend time with you.

You continue to bring so much joy to mommy and daddy. We love you loads!

Hugs and kisses,

Mommy

Nathan's Sleeps in His Own Room

Nathan usually sleeps in his own room during his day time naps, and in mommy and daddy's room at night. Now that he's capable of sleeping thru the night, we figured that we can let him sleep in his own room at night too.

In preparation for that, we decided to lower his cot mattress just in case he sits up or stands up on his own when we are not around. Not that he can do any of that on his own presently... but you never know when.

31 Jan is the first night that Nathan will sleep in his own room alone. After his night feed and warm bath, I told him that he's a big boy now, and he'll be sleeping in his own room from then on. I settled him in his cot, and switched off his room lights. We said our bedtime prayers with Nathan, kissed him good night and left him in his cot to fall asleep on his own. That's his usual bedtime routine. He's usually capable of falling asleep on his own without much fuss. That night, I suspect he got confused and wondered why he was in his downstairs cot instead of his upstairs cot. He cried once. Mommy went in to explain that he's sleeping in his own room from now, and assured him that all is well. After a few minutes, he cried again. This time, daddy went in. He fell asleep soon after. At about 3am, I heard him crying thru the baby monitor. I went into his room, tucked him under his blanket, and said, "Nathan, mommy's here". He took one look at me, popped his thumb back into his mouth, and fell asleep soon after. The next time he woke up was at 8am, for his first feed. :)

I didn't expect that it'd be a difficult move as he usually sleeps in his own room in the day, and even when he sleeps in our room at night, he sleeps in his own cot. Maybe it was more difficult for me than for Nathan. I felt a tinge of sadness as I walked back to our room without Nathan. For the last few months, I would carry him to our room after his bath, tuck him in his cot, pray with him and leave him to fall asleep on his own. I could hear him when he sucks his thumb, and could easily check on him in the middle of the night. I felt sad as my baby has grown that little bit older. Old enough to sleep in his own room. It's the same feeling I get each time he hits a new milestone. On one hand, I'm filled with joy that he can now do something new, but at the same time, I'm sad cos he's grown that little bit older. Strange... I wonder if it's just me. Dean doesn't really feel that way. He says they'll be more milestones even as he grows.

After that first night, he didn't cry anymore when I left him in his room the next two nights. He didn't even wake up in the middle of the night to fuss. My baby has really grown that little bit older. *sob*